What do I need really bad right now?

Status:

Under this easy-going facade, I've been going through many difficulties. Ravenous kids at my school, one in particular (white freshman girly voice)… thinks he could talk to me. He never stops coming up to me and asking me to wear my glasses. Yesterday he walked up to me and I stuck my hand right into his face, without any hesitation, I walk past him.

Another mishap is about how the human's feelings work: love.



When you meet someone, for the first time, you feel as if you have something going for you. Going for the both of you…
…But one thing comes to mind for me at first, the future. What's going to happen in the next three months, how about the next 6 months? The answer to that is unpredictable, endless.
What is the reason for that "someone"? I say, that person is there for you because of enjoyment, a sense of love, someone who will always be there for you no matter what, in need of a close friend, someone who shares the same likes/dislikes, someone who will always make you feel like you're worth a million bucks…when you feel like nothing… that person can give you a great time, that person won't leave you if everyone else wants to do something elsewhere.All these things don't just come out of nowhere, you find someone you see who has the potential to be your bf/gf. You give it a go for a couple weeks, months… however you both feel comfortable with… then when it's the right time… when you're sure of a chance at that addiction we all call love, then take it to the next level. The confirmation of being a couple is one step, maintaining a steady or escalating relationship is another.

Is it hard to maintain interest rather than losing it? This question I've been wondering for a while…




I have these moments …lol.. 'breakdowns'… at times where school/parentals/life-in general starts taking control of me, but right now, all I want to do is breath…calm down. walk along the shore, glide my toes through the cold lifeless livegiving water and start to sing…"Ordinary People" by John Legend. haha
Either that or a night out with friends…preferably … the friends who will give up any part of their day just to have a talk with me. A friend who will listen to my complications, and guide me through obstacles.
I want everything to work out. I need a vacation, I want Summer to come back.



i just took a break from blogging for about 10 min, i decided to make kalamari! i feel happy now. <3

curviture on the definition of trust.

For those who suffer the nostalgic/present day love,

dont think too much about this four letter addiction. Let it unwind as must. talk to your supporters, your family, your friends….not friends… more like.. best friends.

"i know im young but i know love, and i know i know an angel if i saw one"
-gabe bondoc





"remember i said i would wait for you"
-anonymous

worst day ever.

today has been a bad day.
ughh. i got kicked off NHS. im starting to regret getting into NHS. T__T i wish the last board was here to like, "guide" them because this years board doesnt know how to manage anything.

Marylynn, so someone said they wanted to see your hc dress so i went on your blog. then that someone was like "youre a creeper! youre not even Marylynns friend and you know her blog!" ….
T____T really?… wow.

new haircut.

i got a haircut this weekend at Triko salon.
i love it. i think ima go there more often now and change my cuts a bit. haha. if you ever decide to go there… ask for a man named Vincent. he cut my hair :D <3 owner/ stylist.

stress and college mean the same thing.

(earlier this morning… we had a earthquake drill)

i began typing my essay today during sixth period. Well, as a matter of fact i don't have a 6th, thats how i started :D
i was sitting outside near a tree near the grassy knoll. As u can tell, its kind of my inspiration writing place.


"I see it as a blank canvas that must be indulged in beautiful art. "It", as in anything I can get my hands on that is. I strive as any virtuoso would do so, and that is to do what is right, create anything out of nothing, and use a contemporary flow of thought that appeals to my senses. When my mind begins to wander off into its own attraction, I grasp the visuals in my head and connect the made-up dots I project onto a canvas. I pick up my brush and without any hesitation, without any mistakes, I begin to create a painting, flawless."

one of my paragraphs in my essay due tomorrow :[ i hope my prudent judgements on this essay will earn my the grade i deserve.

finally got my lunchpass.which makes me nd her happy

jackie :] <3

foreign treasures

Various identities within my ambiguous mind.

LOL EPIC FAIL

Gradient Loving

Time gives us options. Options are decided by the blank thoughtful choices we make. Choices are our careless/considerate decisions that appear to be common sense to us. Sometimes I wish that I could make sense for once and someone would acknowledge that. Every moment that my mom and I would make eye contact, the excess apathy seeping through her face shows another way of her flaunting her stubbornness, but to ensure her stingy being, she shoots me down by cooking a delicious bountiful meal and not offering any of it. :[ i miss my mom's cooking. I miss when she worries for me when I sleep in so she comes into my room to wake me up. I miss when she tells me to clean my room. I miss when she makes fun of people when shes driving. I miss our conversations. Why must the principle of insecurity, doubt, and awful spite turn us around. I hope everything will turn out for the better, and i know you don't read my blogs but … if you ever do,
I love you mom <3

JAckieTraNs<2